"I'll Make a Man Out of You"

It's been a couple months since I've posted some North Korea news. Some of you will remember the posts about the sinking of the Cheonan and the reactions between North and South, as well as the flexing of power between the U.S. and China holding naval exercises.

The recent news pertaining to North Korea has been largely focused on Kim Jong il's latest trip to China. He had met with Chinese leaders a few months ago after the sinking of the Cheonan, a trip in which some theorize that Kim was trying to get support from China due to the US/ROK's blaming the North for torpedoing the ship, and then imposing new sanctions on the DPRK.

Kim met again with Chinese delagates a few days ago, this time it seems that he is seeking China's approval to hand over power to his youngest son - twenty-something-year-old Kim Jong Un. Apparently, Jong il has been grooming his youngest son for power over the last year after he suffered a mild stroke. Jong il is reported to have 3 sons - the eldest is seen as spoiled, studied in Switzerland, and likes to travel with fake passports - as he did in Japan trying to go to Toyko's Disney World (and was caught). As an embarrassment to the DPRK he was not a likely candidate. Neither is the middle son who no one really knows of.

 

CNN's story:

Grooming Jong Un for power needs the support of China as well as the Workers' Party of Korea, so his father has been spreading stories of his greatness to the people of the North. Some reports said that shrines were being made to honor him in small villages.

There has also been some posturing due to financial issues on the side of the North. Recently, an American activist (and religious whack job) named Aijalon Gomes crossed into the North to bring attention to the human rights violations and starving children in the DPRK - which he was quickly captured and sentenced to hard labor (seemingly trying to copy Robert Park - another idiot). Former President Jimmy Carter flew to the North to gain his release - who knows what the U.S. actually ended up doing to achieve this - money or aid I'm sure.

The DPRK also captured a South Korean fishing vessel recently, and around the same time suffered some severe flooding. It is reported that the South would be giving the North over 8 million dollars in aid - and all of a sudden, the fishermen were returned to the South.

The game is still being played. The chess pieces of North and South are being moved about by the US and China, and is being bet on by the international community in form of coroporations who want to get cash in their pockets in the long run.

When will we humans ever learn....?

" 'Round Midnight "

Big day....long post.

This morning started the new school year. I was asked to prepare a small speech (very small speech) for the parents of the incoming 1st grade class (7th graders US). I wasn't expecting the entire 1st grade class to be there as well...(400+ kids!)

My speech went very well. I said "good morning", my name, and that I was from the US - all the time repeating my words in Korean.  I also went on to explain I had been teaching at my school since June 2009, and that I was excited to start a new year and get to know the new class. Ok, that part needed to be translated.

Interestingly, my co-worker (we'll call her Betty for now), didn't come to school this morning. It was a long weekend due to the holiday, and I had overheard that she visited Jeju Island. Not surprising to me, as she has had the tendency to not come to school randomly and be "sick" to get extra days off. We tried calling, e-mailing, and heard nothing from her. Her phone was off, and the teachers were not happy since she was supposed to be teaching today, the parents were here expecting to see 2 foreign teachers, and she didn't call.

My e-mail to Betty was responded quickly this morning by her basically saying "I left Korea. I arrived in NYC this morning, I couldn't stand teaching with (one of my co-teachers) any longer, thanks for everything!"

Outrageously, she had been planning this for weeks. The school wanted to fire her, but knew it would be easier if she quit, so they waited it out. She worked during the vacation when we had no classes until she got her next paycheck, and just left without a word to anyone -- a typical midnight run, common among foreign teachers who undergo bad working conditions - usually at hagwons.

The staff was shocked. I, however, was not surprised. This had been coming for a long time. There had been a constant battle between the head English teacher and her since she walked in the door in November. Curses were flung, yelling and ranting carried on, there was constant disrespectful behavior, - belittling, complaining, inappropriateness, and insults seemed to be a daily occurrence -- all by Betty.

There were problems on both ends. There was a lack of communication with the head teacher and misunderstandings due to language and culture. The head teacher is very Christian, in an annoying way, but it seemed to always irk Betty as she was sent e-mails like "I pray for you everyday" and "remember God loves you!" - annoying if you're not religious, and inappropriate for westerners in the workplace - but NOT a huge issue. I dealt with it a long time ago, and haven't been bothered since October. But Betty took it too personally and too far. She ranted about how the head teacher wouldn't leave her alone, and that it was disrespectful for her to e-mail her about how much God loves her because she doesn't believe in God. My favorite tantrum  (of oh-so-many) was:

"I don't believe in God! You are totally disrespectful to me when you e-mail me about God! I'm half Jewish! That's very disrespectful to someone half Jewish! I'm half Jewish!, don't you get that? Of course not because all you Koreans are Christian! I'm half Jewish! I don't believe in God!"

Apparently Jews don't believe in God? I think the Old Testament would differ with her on that one...
Maybe her other half was Atheist - because that would make a whole lot of sense too!  - (some of you will think that she meant Jesus - but Jesus had never been mentioned in any altercation)

But it's all over. She's gone, and we can all move on. It feels as though a infection has started to heal. Betty was not good for the students (they didn't want to have her as a teacher), the co-teachers all didn't want to work with her anymore even after they tried. I gave up on her months ago as well...but sucked it up and put a smile on my face every day, just so life would be bearable. Now, I wish I had told her off. But that's what blogs can be for - venting.

Here are some of the issues which I would like to address for people thinking about coming to Korea to teach:

      DO NOT:      

1. Don't look for jobs at hagwons! They usually make people miserable. Remember, they are cram schools --- businesses. They are there to make money, and will cut corners, change your contract, and force you to do all sorts of crap you didn't sign up for (and can tend to forget to pay you on time!). This is not to say ALL hagwon are bad - some people I know have good ones. But public schools are the way to go, albeit harder to find jobs in.

2. Do not come to Korea if you are not sure if you applied to a hagwon or public school, you probably are too stupid to come to Korea, and therefore will make a bad teacher .

3.  Don't expect that just because Korea is industrialized and more than semi-westernized that it is a western country. It is NOT. I've said this a thousand times: "BE OPEN MINDED!"

4. Don't come here if you are a complainer or overly sensitive. I will punch you in the face if I hear you complain about how all Korean foods have meat in them, or how people don't speak English well enough for you. If a teacher or student calls you chubby, fat, large, or overweight and you go home crying that Koreans are rude you will not survive. They are translating their language into ours, and it comes out pretty bluntly. It's not meant to be offensive.

5. Don't come here if you would rather go to McDonalds, Bennigans, TGIFriday's, Outback, Dunkin Donuts, Starbucks, or some pizza joint than explore Korean foods. It seems to be a sign of those unwilling to be culturally immersed or even make an attempt at getting to know the culture through the food. I'm not saying you should NEVER eat at a western place - I'm just saying you should make the attempt to try new foods.

6. Don't come here if you are unwilling to try to learn - especially the language. If you've been here a year (like Betty) and can only say "hello", "thank you", "please" and count to 3 in the language you better leave after you contract ends. I learned 3 times more than that just on the 15 hour plane ride here. (as well as memorized their alphabet!)

7. Don't come here if you are still a child. Korea is ripe with recent college grads, most of which drink and party away every weekend, and even some weekdays. If you can't handle your finances,  disorderly behavior, "Asian fever" urges, living on your own without Mommy and Daddy to help you, or living without easy access to drugs, Korea is not for you.

8. Don't come here if you are an outcast in your own country or have a mental disorder that got by the screen process by your employer. Outcasts at home are outcasts here. Mentally unstable people (Betty) give me grief and embarrass other foreigners - Koreans can relate your antics thinking all foreigners are as bad as you.

9. Don't come here if you are trying to escape relationship issues or are expecting to find a hot girlfriend/future wife. Maybe you've heard the stories that Korean women throw themselves at you. It's not true. If they are talking to you it is not because you are hot to them. They want to practice speaking English. If you are escaping a relationship, or just broke up and needed to 'get away' from it all, you are making a bad choice. The anger/sadness you feel now will wear off, and then you'll just get homesick and miserable and bring other people down.

10. Lastly, don't be afraid. Things can work out amazingly well if you just have that sense of being open-minded, keep your finances together, are a calm, patient, understanding person who is looking to have a good time, explore, meet new people, and try new things.

Oh, and if by chance, "Betty" is reading this: How dare you demand respect from teachers who tried so hard to help you and understand you. You EARN respect by being respectful - something you obviously never learned or understood.

"Treat others as you want them to treat you, because what goes around comes around.”

Let's leave this post on a high note with some famous Korean singers trying to speak English and having no clue what they are really talking about....

"Rocketman - Part 2"

I had posted in December on an ESL teacher and comic artist named Luke Martin who posts his creations about Korean culture from the eyes of just about every expat at his site: Roketship

Here are a few more favorites:

 

I love being immune to the effects of the annoying solicitors simply because I'm white. It's a nice perk not having to be approached. However, they sometimes seem to not pay attention, and I've had them jump in front of my creating small collisions just so they can give the flyer to the Korean next to me. The immunity seems to dissipate when I walk around with my girlfriend though. In fact, for some reason, I become a larger target for restaurant advertisements.

I live next to a University hospital, and during the warm weather (and sometimes cold) I see patients walking about like pictured above. Sometimes just to get some fresh air, smoke, or exercise. I'm used to it now, but in the summer when I first arrived I thought it was bizarre and that maybe they got out of the hospital without people knowing.

As a foreigner, I get stared at by older people. 

A lot.

You never really get used to that awkwardness.

I try not to laugh when I see women wearing heels in the snow and ice. The craziest is the women still trying to look sexy and wearing mini-skirts and heals in sub zero temperatures. Even crazier is students running in the snow with sandals. Ah, Korea!

It is a must-have to have attached to your cell-phone some sort of flair. Most of these are actually functional as well and serve as the subway pass, a USB, or the antenna for your cell phone to watch TV on it. I hate them and refuse to do it because I find them annoying and I usually like my phone to sit in my pocket comfortably.

All I can say is how true this is. Oh, and that if you are thinking about coming to Korea, you CAN get by on using charades. However, don't bother coming if you think this way: 

"I don't need to learn Korean, because I will never use it after I leave Korea." 

If you come to Korea, try to learn the language. If you're here just to make some money and not appreciate or try to understand the culture and people you'll be miserable and make people like me embarrassed to be associated with you.

I only know one person who isn't a teacher - and they're simply here because spouse is.

OK, last one for now...

I admit, I do this a lot. Sometimes I have a woman who is selling things door-to-door as well, and just ignore her. It's great to have the video intercom though to filter them out.
I just wish I could somehow hide from the other ultra-religious types in the ROK. Like some of my teachers, the guys on the streets that are super persistent, and the ones on the subway that are just plain annoying.